So you think I may be exaggerating just a little?

You have tried meditation and it is just not for you. You can’t quiet your mind long enough to feel any of the benefits I am talking about. I have heard many reasons for not meditating, and I understand if my personal experience is not quite enough to sway you to try meditation. Hopefully this recent study on mindfulness meditation will help you to see the value in starting your own regular meditation practice.

(PhysOrg.com) — Participating in an 8-week mindfulness meditation program appears to make measurable changes in brain regions associated with memory, sense of self, empathy and stress.

“Although the practice of meditation is associated with a sense of peacefulness and physical relaxation, practitioners have long claimed that meditation also provides cognitive and psychological benefits that persist throughout the day,” says Sara Lazar, PhD, of the MGH Psychiatric Neuroimaging Research Program, the study’s senior author. “This study demonstrates that changes in brain structure may underlie some of these reported improvements and that people are not just feeling better because they are spending time relaxing.”

“It is fascinating to see the brain’s plasticity and that, by practicing meditation, we can play an active role in changing the brain and can increase our well-being and quality of life.” says Britta Hölzel, PhD, first author of the paper and a research fellow at MGH and Giessen University in Germany.

The uplifted feeling I get after sitting in meditation is not just because I took a few moments to sit quietly and relax, it is because my brain is being reconstructed. The participants in this 8 week study reported meditating for an average of 27 minutes a day. Analysis of MR images, which focused on areas where meditation-associated differences were seen in earlier studies, found increased grey-matter density in the hippocampus, known to be important for learning and memory, and in structures associated with self-awareness, compassion and introspection.

Meditation actually changes our brain structure.

I have tried several different styles of meditation, and the type of meditation I chose on any given day really depends on how active my mind is. There are some schools that believe there is only one way to meditate properly. I am not enrolled in any of those schools.

If you read Eat, Pray, Love and are unexperienced in meditation, you may think the meditation described in the book is the only way to practice – sitting for hours in pain, judging yourself harshly until your mind cooperates and quiets down, taking four months in an ashram to finally achieve a good meditation practice. It does not have to be that difficult.

Many of us have participated in the Chopra Center 21 Day Meditation Challenge.

It is a great and gentle introduction into different types of meditation, and in fact the Winter 21 Day Challenge began today. It is not too late to sign up if you are interested. The meditations last an average of 15 minutes each. They are guided by The Chopra Center’s lead educator Davidji. His voice is soothing and seductive as he guides participants through a different meditation technique each day. I highly recommend this challenge if you are considering starting your own meditation practice and would like to be eased into it.

For another simple, yet powerful breathing meditation practice, Thich Nhat Hanh’s Conscious Breathing Practice never fails to center me.

From Peace is Every Step, by Thich Nhat Hanh

“There are a number of breathing techniques you can use to make life vivid and more enjoyable. The first exercise is very simple. As you breathe in, you say to yourself, “Breathing in, I know that I am breathing in.” And as you breathe out, say, “Breathing out, I know that I am breathing out.” Just that. You recognize your in-breath as an in-breath and your out-breath as an out-breath. You don’t even need to recite the whole sentence; you can use just two words: “In” and “Out.” This technique can help you keep your mind on your breath. As you practice, your breath will become peaceful and gentle, and your mind and body will also become peaceful and gentle. This is not a difficult exercise. In just a few minutes you can realize the fruit of meditation.”

So tonight, after I finish writing and editing this post, I am going to roll out my mat, light some incense, and sit silently in meditation. And in doing so I will let go of the frustrations of my day, and prepare myself to sleep a peaceful, restorative sleep. The ten, twenty, or thirty minutes I dedicate to my meditation practice will continue to serve me for hours after. That’s a pretty good trade off of time don’t you think?

Sometimes they happen when, after several days of feeling good, I wake up in the kind of pain that is impossible to reason. Or they happen when I reflect on how long I have been sick, and how long it is going to take me to heal. Sometimes they happen for no specific reason at all. I just get tired of the work, tired of the journey, and I just want to stop.

But I don’t stop – for too long anyway. And the thing that propels me forward and makes me keep showing up is this – the moments.

There are moments in our lives, moments that when they happen make us say: “Ah-ha, this is it! This is what it is all about.” Sometimes they happen when I am on my yoga mat and all the pieces come together and I feel nothing but joy. Or they happen at a support group function when I see a member’s face transform from agony to acceptance over the course of the evening. They can happen in a phone call, or from an email, or an exchange on facebook. They happen all the time. We just have to be aware and present to receive them.

Yesterday I scheduled a last minute group meditation at the Chopra Center. It is something we do together once a month, but I missed the one earlier this month, so I scheduled an extra one just for me. As I was heading out the door, for a moment, I had the urge not to go. It had been a long day – 2 1/2 hours of yoga teacher training followed by 90 minutes of gentle yoga at the YMCA. I was tired, and could easily have stayed home, especially since no other members had signed up to go. But I showed up – for me – because meditation nourishes me, and I was pleased to be joined by another member at the last minute.

Group meditation can be powerful, taking you much deeper into your practice, but it can also create unique challenges. A few minutes after we were seated in meditation, a late-comer burst in the door, literally crashed into the chairs, and then took about 3 minutes to get settled. THEN the very loud band started playing at the nearby restaurant (end of summer festivities). AND THEN the very loud late-comer began snoring and snorting! At one point I had to focus very hard to keep from laughing out loud at the absurdity of it all!

It is the most distracted I have ever been during a meditation, and yet I still felt restored by it. Walking back to my car I realized I was not nearly as fatigued as when I arrived. I am certain I was not in deep meditation for too long because of all the distractions, but however much I did was enough. I am so glad I showed up. If I had stayed home I would have been feeding my fatigue rather than nourishing myself. And it was great spending some one on one time with a member who need some guidance.

So all in all, there were several moments last night to keep me going – and keep me laughing. I cherish those moments, and that is why I keep showing up – because you just never know when one will appear.

From davidji, Dean of The Chopra Center University:

“Rituals are powerful behaviors. And when you combine ritual with meaning, amazing things happen – you get transformation. And transformation is a form of evolution. So by adding meditation into your daily set of rituals, it will effortlessly become a part of you.”

Each morning we wake up to a new guided meditation in our email inbox, and it has taken just six short days for me to appreciate, and even crave the meditations led by davidji. I think I am well on my way to creating a new morning ritual!

Todays meditation began with a body scan. This is an important and very powerful exercise we can all do daily. It does not need to be part of a meditation practice. On its own it is a great way to become present and in tuned with individual sensations in our bodies – good and bad. Often it happens that we acknowledge the pain and lose sight of the rest. A body scan will allow you to become aware of the parts of you that are quiet and comfortable, even in the most severe flares. If you begin your day with an active awareness and celebration of the good, it may just help to manage the other.

So while seated comfortably with my head phones in, I followed the gentle, almost seductive voice of davidji as he lead us in a celebration and exploration of our bodies. First, I celebrated my toes:

“How are my toes doing? How are my toes? Let’s celebrate my toes.”

I did not get past my toes and I was already smiling and joyful with this exercise. My toes felt good! Happy little toes! Happy to stretch and wiggle and slide across the cool, smooth surface of the wood floors. Who knew toes could bring such joy? (Besides my little Koko. She loves toes!)

As we proceeded to scan and bring awareness to our bodies from the toes up, I discovered more and more things to celebrate. I celebrated my feet for the stability they bring me – moving on to my shins and calves, on up to my knees – celebrating my knees for all their flexing and bearing, and for how hard they work. And on and on upwards. It was a magnificent celebration of my body – the same body that for so long has been the source of so much pain – physical, mental, emotional. Not today. Today it was a celebration.

Can you imagine scanning your body right now and finding things to celebrate? I hope you can. And if you cannot, please, try the day six meditation for yourself. It takes about 15 minutes from start to finish. It may be best to try it in the morning, but anytime you can find to sit down and meditate is a good time.

So today was a success, as have been the previous five day’s meditations. I am so pleased I signed up to participate in this challenge, and grateful to have you to share it with. And I would really like to know – what did you celebrate today?

What do you do when you are having a relatively good day, but suddenly hit a wall? Do you push through, or do you slow down and give in to it? There is a BIG brick wall looming just ahead of me. Can’t decide if I want to try and hurdle it or lay down before I smash my face into it! Let’s discuss. I would love to know how you manage.

There were many great responses that are worth taking the time to read. After reading them I knew I wanted to continue the conversation with a new blog post, and as often happens in life, I was further inspired to do so by my yoga practice today.

I was in a new class with a new instructor. This is always a thrilling and completely terrifying experience for me. Will I be able to keep up? What is their teaching style – gentle and nurturing or kick-butt boot camp style?

The teacher has a dramatic effect on your yoga experience and sets the tone for the entire practice. My favorites are the gentle leaders who guide with simple, clear directives and encourage everyone to honor where they are on that particular day. A good yoga instructor understands that our bodies can be different from day to day – even from morning to afternoon, and afternoon to evening. This is just one of the reasons why yoga – with the right instructor – is an excellent mindful movement for fibromyalgia. But I digress…

Just a few moments into my practice, I knew I had chosen the right class. He was gentle and clear, explaining how to elongate the spine while bending gently to the side. With my eyes closed, I focused on his voice and his directions, and found new joy in a pose I have done many times. It was a great “ah-ha” moment and my body responded with pleasure.

And then he said something that I felt like a wave rushing through my entire body:

Find the space between pleasure and pain, and rest there.

I was instantly overwhelmed with the intention and deep meaning that statement held for me. Much deeper than the obvious benefit it was to my practice on my mat that day – it is something we can all apply directly to living well with chronic illness everyday. Read it again. Read it several times. Read it out loud.

Find the space between pleasure and pain, and rest there.

How does it make you feel? For me, I felt empowered – empowered to know that space exists and empowered to know I was learning how to find it.

The space between pleasure and pain. This concept is difficult for the fibromyalgia sufferer. It is a space many do not know how to reach. And even if we do reach it, we may not be able to appreciate it, as we have become conditioned to brace ourselves for the next surge of pain. Admit it, some of you think finding this space is as likely as finding a unicorn there when you reach it. Right?

But this space is real. It does exist. We just need to learn to quiet ourselves long enough to find it, and then trust it enough to relax into it.  It is like finding the silence between our thoughts with meditation – the silence is there, we just have to learn to find it. It takes effort. It takes practice. It requires mindfulness. But it is real.

Rest. A simple word that is a difficult concept for those of us living with chronic illness. Often we are forced to rest, and it is anything but restful. Then, sometimes we chose to rest, but we are distracted by all the other “more productive” things we can be doing with our time. We fail to see how productive resting truly is.

Like all mindful approaches to living, embracing and living in the restful moments is a process. It takes work. How ridiculous does that sound? It takes work to learn how to rest. I wrote it. I believe it. And it still makes me chuckle reading it.

In general, our culture does not embrace rest. We have been conditioned to make the most of every moment. Multitask. Leave no stone unturned. But what bad could possibly happen by leaving a few stones be while you embrace the joy and restoration of rest? Really? Why can’t we learn to love the silence and enjoy the rest?

We can, but it is going to take work – and practice. We have a lot of conditioning to undo. And it is not going to undo itself. Through yoga and meditation – I am starting to come undone. I am unraveling and letting go of the tension I held so rigidly to for years. My space between the pleasure and the pain is growing and I am learning to rest there. I am learning to embrace my chosen moments of rest, rather than wait for the brick wall to force me into it.

You have that space too. We all do. Even on the days when you are certain it does not exist, it does. If you believe it, you can begin to find your way to it – and rest.

I do not consider it a failure that I meditated for the first week of May, and then let myself get away from it. Instead I think of it as a learning opportunity – a chance to examine my goals and purpose further, and to ask myself some thoughtful questions.

Why did I stop?

The easy answer is – I stopped because I went on a family trip, and with all the travel and socializing it was difficult to find the time. And when I returned home I had a lot of work to catch up on, and support group functions to prepare for. I was busy! I had to prioritize – right?

Yes, these are the excuses I gave myself for why I got away from my meditation practice, but upon reflection they are not very good reasons. Isn’t life’s “busyness” the very thing meditation can help me manage? It is certainly one of the things I am hoping it will help me to manage, so I took a deeper look into my motivation.

Why do I want to continue?

Why is this important to me?

These questions were easier for me to answer, because despite my lack of follow-through, my motivations have not changed: I want to be well. I want to be whole. I want the peace and clarity of mind that comes with the silence. I want the daily charge and reinforcement I feel each time I meditate. I want to be centered and grounded. I want to feel alive and open to the world around me. I want the restoration of body that comes with the soundness of mind.

In her book, Beginner’s Guide to Buddhist Meditation, Christina Feldman states, “Meditation requires patience, openness, and acceptance. Each moment in our life asks for our willingness to greet it as a teacher.”

Patience, openness, and acceptance. I wish all three for my life. Meditation is a path to the life I am desiring. This is why I wish to continue. This is why meditation is important to me.

So with patience and kindness to myself, I begin again. And if I fail, I will begin again. There are no rules, or pressure, or standards. There is only my desire, and my never-ending ability to grow and learn.

Last May I challenged myself to a 30 day writing project. My thought being, it takes roughly 30 days to develop a habit, so for each day in May I wrote a blog post. It was a success on some levels, but I failed at making writing a daily habit.

Writing is a form of meditation for me. I write more than what you see here on my blog. I do not always enjoy the process of writing, but I enjoy it most when I am singularly focused on it and my only purpose is on finishing my current sentence and thought. I love those moments when I am completely absorbed in the act of writing.

“Learning to be mindful and present, clear and attentive is the doorway to a life of depth and joy.”

Mindfulness is something I seek to achieve in all aspects of my life – writing, relationships, work, eating, exercise. I want to be happy and present in what I am doing in the moment, not regretful of my past, or anxious of my future. I want to learn to be present in the now, and find a greater joy in the present. I believe meditation is a path to the joy I seek.

I have dabbled with meditation – taking a group class here, listening to a guiding voice there. Each experience with meditation has been restorative and encouraging, but my knowledge and understanding of it is relatively minimal. So this May I am challenging myself to another 30 day project.

For the next 30 days I am going to explore different types of meditation, and practice meditating for at least 20 minutes each day. My goal over the next 30 days is to learn more about the many styles of meditation, and to find the one (0r ones) most compatible with my needs. I also hope in the process to establish a habit, and continue beyond May to dedicate the time each day to meditate.

“There is no end to the meditative process: it is a lifelong practice that can be undertaken by anyone, regardless of age and spiritual beliefs, and there is no right or wrong time to start on your meditative path.”

I am beginning my meditation journey with a book that is intended to help readers begin a meditative path, Beginner’s Guide to Buddhist Meditation,  by Christina Feldman.

Beginner’s Guide to Buddhist Meditation is a beautiful book, filled with soothing images and helpful charts. Organized in a way to guide the beginner from the basics – how to meditate, when to meditate, where to meditate – through the styles and obstacles of meditation, Feldman’s book opens a simple and straightforward door to meditation. There are no rights and wrongs in Feldman’s meditation teaching, only loving kindness and heartfelt communication.

“Meditative teaching is not an exhortation or demand but an invitation to explore the ways of walking new paths of mindfulness and wakefulness. It is an invitation to discover a deeper well-being and inner richness that can transform every aspect of our lives.”

One of my goals for my journey into meditation is, according to Feldman, one of the central teachings of meditation: to be at ease with the events of my mind and body.

We all know that even in the mildest flare, we can become consumed and overwhelmed by the pain we are experiencing – and even by the pain we are not currently experiencing, but are remembering and anticipating. Pain is a powerful motivator for fear and anxiety. I believe it is possible to overcome fear and anxiety, and I believe meditation can help by teaching me compassion, peace, and understanding.

“Understanding: Central to the Buddhist path is the understanding that we cannot avoid aging, sickness, or death. We cannot avoid all loss, sorrow, and heartache, and the endeavor to do so only magnifies pain. We do begin to see that confusion, agitation, fear, and stress may become optional in our lives.”

Fear and stress are an option? If this is so, I doubt we can just accept that it is. At least for me I know it will take practice to learn to let go of my ingrained responses and accept joy. I want to learn to find the joy that exists with the pain. I believe it is there. I just need to learn how to find it.

“Meditation is not about avoiding or softening the blow of moments of conflict and difficulty that we are bound to encounter during our lives. Rather it is a means to approach these moments with clarity, understanding, and calm.”

Beginner’s Guide to Buddhist Meditation is so rich in thought, context, and instruction, I am certain it will serve my desire to develop a regular meditation practice to reread it several times. It is simple and approachable, but Christina Feldman has packed so much guidance and wisdom into its short 96 pages, each time I open it a new passage jumps out at me. Just look back over all of the above quotes and you can see the richness of concepts and wisdom Feldman shares. It is a great tool to begin my journey into meditation.

Are you interested in learning how to meditate, or in deepening your current meditation practice? Then let me recommend Beginner’s Guide to Buddhist Meditation to you. And fortunately I can do more than recommend it. Feldman’s publisher Rodmell Press has again generously donated a book to give away to one commenter. Just leave a comment, and on May 14 I will randomly select a winner to receive this beautiful introduction to meditation.

Join me on my quest for more mindful living. Through meditation we can learn to find acceptance of our illness and joy in the meaningful act of living.

“In your meditation, as in your life, you will have to choose over and over whether to follow the paths of impatience, judgment, frustration, and complexity, or the pathways of patience, acceptance, balance, and simplicity. Increasingly, you will come to understand that the choice lies in your own heart.”

It is too soon to know what, if any, impact this will actually have. The FDA is not required to follow the committee’s recommendation, although historically they do. At the very least it is a good time to consider what options you have to prepare for the possible ban. Prescription painkillers will always be available in some form. With complaints of chronic pain on an epidemic rise, drug companies will see to it. But prescription painkillers need not be the only option for Fibromyalgia pain treatment.

So what can I do to ease my pain naturally?

I am glad you asked! In the midst of a severe Fibromyalgia flare-up, there may be nothing as quick to bring relief as good old - insert your painkiller of choice here, but for daily maintenance and preventative health care, natural is best.

Foods & Herbs

Your food should be your first medicine. In a previous post I listed the many toxic foods to avoid if you have Fibromyalgia. Now lets take a look at foods and herbs beneficial for pain management.

Essential fatty acids are a must. EFAs like Omega-3s are necessary fats that humans cannot synthesize, and must be obtained through diet. Omega-3s have a natural anti-inflammatory quality along with a whole complex of other health benefits. Research indicates that omega-3s may be better absorbed from food than supplements.

Wild salmon is a great source of Omega-3s, as are other fatty fish like albacore tuna, halibut, and sardines. Not a fan of fish? Flaxseed oil and Canola oil are good choices too. Or how about walnuts? Try a sprinkle of walnuts on spinach salad for a nutritious and delicious double dose of essential fatty acids. Summer squash, cauliflower, and broccolli are all very good sources as well.

Herbal remedies also aid in pain relief. Natural pain relief — like herbal medicine, is an increasingly popular way to manage pain.

• Turmeric is gaining great recognition as a natural painkiller. Why not try sprinkling some on that piece of salmon you are grilling up?
• Fresh ginger helps with inflammation.
• Capsaicin applied topically may be beneficial for relieving pain.
• Feverfew has been found useful for treating migraines.
• Ginseng is listed by the American Pain Foundation as beneficial for Fibromyalgia pain treatment.

If you are serious about trying herbal remedies for pain relief, I advise that you consult with your physician or a licensed herbalist who understands how powerful these herbs can be.

Soak on it

More and more research indicates that Fibromyalgia patients suffer from magnesium deficiency. Magnesium is extremely important to many functions in the body, and a deficiency can cause several of the symptoms associated with Fibromyalgia. There are great benefits in taking an Epsom salt bath, rich in hydrated magnesium sulfate, which is easily absorbed through the skin.

As listed on the Epsom Salt Industry Council website, here are some of the health benefits to be had from an epsom salt bath:

• Flushes toxins and heavy metals from the cells, easing muscle pain and helping the body to eliminate harmful substances.
• Relieves stress. Excess adrenaline and stress are believed to drain magnesium, a natural stress reliever, from the body. Magnesium is necessary for the body to bind adequate amounts of serotonin, a mood-elevating chemical within the brain that creates a feeling of well being and relaxation.
• Reduces inflammation to relieve pain and muscle cramps.
• Improves oxygen use.
• Improves absorption of nutrients.
• Improves formation of joint proteins, brain tissue and mucin proteins.
• Prevents or eases migraine headaches.

I don’t think we could ask much more from a simple bath! Epsom salt baths are so relaxing and therapeutic, I recommend you take two or three a week – more if your level of pain dictates. Before bed is a great time, as you will find yourself so relaxed by the natural serotonin boost, you will be able to gently drift off into a restorative sleep.

Just Breathe

Yoga, Qigong, meditation and many other mind-body practices teach the healing properties of purposeful breathing. Conscious breathing can actually change your body chemistry by increasing oxygen supply to your cells and prompting the production of endorphins, which are the body’s natural pain killers. Deep breathing relaxes the muscles and calms the mind.

In her book Yoga for Fibromyalgia, Shoosh Lettick Crotzer teaches The Healing Breath technique. To practice this, begin in a seated pose with your feet flat on the floor and your arms resting lightly on your thighs. Close your eyes, follow the directions below, and let your breath heal.

Inhale and exhale slowly, focusing on how the air feels as it passes through your nose, into your body, and back out. Think of your breath as the gift of life – prana: life force. Let it feel soothing as it flows inside. If you have general pain, visualize this healing breath filling your whole body. If your pain is more specific, on inhalations, bring the breath directly to your pain. Then, for either type of pain, let each new inhalation bring energy to expand and soften, cleanse and release, rejuvenate. With the exhalations, let the tensions and heaviness of your pain flow out with the breath. Breathe slowly, and continue until you feel quiet, heavy, and more relaxed. Come out of the pose when you are ready. Notice the difference you have made in yourself.

Mindful breathing will bring you more in-tune with your body. It is something we should all practice everyday, regardless of our level of pain.

Good Health Requires Mindfulness

Self care is critical in the management of Fibromyalgia. There is no magic pill that will reverse all of the symptoms we live with. There never will be. So instead of waiting for the magic bullet, we should focus on simple and manageable things we can do to help improve our health and wellbeing. It may take a great combination of holistic and natural remedies, combined with the care of our doctors, to really achieve optimal results. Be your own best health advocate and practice the Healing Breath technique, cook yourself some salmon for dinner, and then take a relaxing epsom salt bath. You are worth the effort.

Ever notice when you are sitting at the beach, or walking through a forest you feel more relaxed, more connected, more observant? Even simply gazing out a window onto a garden or nature setting is calming and soothing. Nature’s healing power is undeniable.

I am blessed to live in North San Diego County. There is a great energy and spirit here – magical really. It is hard to explain, but the land and the community seem to promote health and wellness. Just two miles from my front door is a beautiful lagoon and nature preserve Batiquitos Lagoon. I have lived in this neighborhood for over a year, but just recently began walking the serene nature path along the lagoon’s edge. What took me so long?

Walking is good for me. Right?

As we all know, walking, while it is touted as something we should all be doing, can often cause as severe a flare as high-impact activity. While yoga has become my new go-to exercise, I have shied away from walking very much because it is more problematic for me. But there are so many things about the lagoon trail that make it perfect for me, and now I look forward to walking it as frequently as possible.

The trail itself is a flat, easy, two mile walk one way. The lagoon is just off the ocean so even in the hottest time of the day there is a cooling breeze, and much of the trail is shaded by giant Eucalyptus trees. And if that were not comfortable and inviting enough, every tenth of a mile or so, there is a strategically placed bench welcoming trail enthusiasts to have a seat and take in the serene surroundings.

From Great Blue Heron, to the endangered Least Turns, there are birds a plenty to watch flying overhead or feeding along the shoreline. I have no idea what crazy kind of fish are in the lagoon, but it is impossible not to see them leaping up out of the water, taunting pelicans with their acrobatics. The habitat is beautiful and diverse. My favorite is the gigantic, pre-historic looking sago palms – 30-40 feet in height, I can just imagine what lives amid their great fronds.

I love the the Batiquitos Lagoon!

It is my new meditation spot and happy place. Serenity finds me each time I am there. I have walked more in the past month then I did all year, and for the most part, flare-free. What more could I ask for?

Plus, did I mention? Finley loves it too.

Melissa J. Roth CHt., Ph.D. is CEO and Founder of Alabama Hypnotherapy Center and Hypnosis Associates. She is a Certified Clinical Hypnotherapist and Doctor of Hypnotherapy. She is certified by the American Council of Hypnotist Examiners and the American Board of Hypnotherapy.  She is currently a member of the  American Council of Hypnotist Examiners, International Medical and Dental Hypnotherapy Association, International Association of Counselors and Therapists and the National League of Medical Hypnotherapists.

As a result of healing herself of irritable bowel syndrome and fibromyalgia using hypnosis, Melissa J. Roth founded Alabama Hypnotherapy Center, located in Birmingham, AL, in 1995 and has specialized in medical applications of hypnotherapy.  She has developed a number of unique approaches to chronic illnesses which have become the treatments of choice worldwide.  She partners with physicians of every specialty to promote hypnosis as an important and valuable tool in the medical toolbox.  She has a conversational teaching style that is sometimes heretical,  sometimes funny, but always informative.  In a sense, she teaches from experience.

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The Law of Detachment says that in order to acquire anything in the physical universe, you have to relinquish your attachment to it. This doesn’t mean you give up the intention to create your desire. You don’t give up the intention, and you don’t give up the desire. You give up your attachment to the results.

I am sharing this with you to explain an epiphany I had last week while attending an introduction to meditation class at The Chopra Center. I scheduled the event as a support group function and was hopeful that many members would take advantage of the free class. The RSVPs for the event were low – 5 yes, and 3 maybe. It is understandable and common to have people unwell enough to attend or to change their RSVP at the last minute from yes/maybe to no. In the end only three of us made it to meditation, and one member who showed had to leave because she was having a reaction to the incense burning throughout the center.

As I sat there trying to relax and prepare for the meditation I was unfocused and thinking about what more I could have done to encourage participation. I believe strongly that meditation is a great tool to aid us in our never-ending quest for wellness. How could I share my beliefs with the members and make them believers too? These thoughts distracted me, but soon the instructor was able to gain my full attention. At the end of the class she shared with us the intention of Chopra’s Law of Detachment and read to us the following step explaining how to apply the law:

Today I will commit myself to detachment. I will allow myself and those around me the freedom to be as they are. I will not ridgidly impose my idea of how things should be. I will not force solutions on problems, thereby creating new problems. I will participate in everything with detached involvement.

There it was. The universe was speaking to me on that day and telling me to let go and detach from the expectations I have placed on the meetings and events I schedule for the group. It was like a weight being lifted. There were about 15 people in the room but I felt like she was speaking directly to me.

There is no reason for me to get frustrated or discouraged when my members do not attend. I cannot set their goals and intentions for them. I cannot tell them what will work and what will be good for them. I can only continue to schedule meetings and events, enjoy the members who do attend, and give the members who do not attend opportunities to do so in the future. My intention when I started the support group was to create a place for people with Fibromyalgia and chronic pain to come together to learn, laugh, share, and encourage. My intentions have not changed, but I had become too conscious and attached to the results. I am determined now to let go of my expectations and just continue with my intentions. Good things will happen and members will show when they are ready.

The Law of Detachment was read to me on a day when I needed the lesson the most. I am so grateful that I was present and open to the message. Isn’t it amazing how serendipitous our universe can be at times?

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